Thursday, June 2, 2016

Preaching across the border


“And then I felt sad because I realized that once people are broken in certain ways, they can't ever be fixed, and this is something nobody ever tells you when you are young and it never fails to surprise you as you grow older as you see the people in your life break one by one. You wonder when your turn is going to be, or if it's already happened.” 
― Douglas Coupland

Recently I came across this short video in YouTube (I am not sure whether it was an advertisement or just a social message), where the question of "if you ever meet your younger self what would you tell her" is addressed…it was quite a happy video, the actress was pretty and the lighting and the scene was soft and mellow, she was seen siting on the floor, sorting through some old stuff like photographs and books…while doing so she comes across an old photo of her younger self and she starts to reminisce and talk to the camera about what she would tell her young self…things like “Don’t worry, blah blah, things mostly work out”, or something to that effect…she ended with a very silly line, something about India winning the world cup in 2011, maybe it wasn’t silly to her or people who like the game, I personally can’t stand cricket, so there!

It got me thinking, what would I say to my younger self? I couldn’t be all optimistic and tell her things work out mostly, when I wasn't sure if they do? I wonder…wouldn’t it also depend on how young my self is when I speak to her? In the video I think the younger self of the actress was around 11, so I guess we could start with the same assumption…so what would I tell my 11 year old self? I feel totally blank, I don’t know where to start, but surely I couldn’t tell her everything will work out or can I? I had such different dreams back then, most of them never came true, some of them might still do…I sound bitter don’t I? But I don’t really feel bitter, most of the dreams I had back then were not as burning as others, I could get over the fact they never came true, the ones I still hold on too, they are still important to me I guess. It’s true though “Regrets collect like old friends; Here to relive your darkest moments” but eventually one gets over it. 

What else would I tell her? Life wears you down; some things that seem like everything at one point just fade in importance over the years, like those old photos in the tattered album, sticking in between the pages…I couldn’t understand the optimism of the female in the video, what she so happy about, what else could she say to her younger self besides everything works out? Well, for starters she could mention that sometimes, actually most of the times, things take a turn for the worst before really changing for the better if at all, that people usually lose their teeth, their innocence, their ideals, their hair before really achieving anything worthwhile or maybe during the transition of losing things they realize that life is all about the journey, the moment, while we wait for something better, like a better job, a better love, a better house or a better life, we lose out what we have, the present…the only thing I could tell her is to live life, I guess that’s all, everything else is just background noise….